Mindfulness

Mindfulness as a daily practice allows me to stay in the "Now." I always have had a tendency, like most, to look at my past and go over it and over it. For me, it only brings with it the ugly word I hate. GUILT. I , for some reason, will find so many things from my past to feel guilty about( destroying my life, sexual misconduct, shopping sprees, phone bills, and so on and so on.) I never can say and all those you hurt have forgiven you for what you did ,so I now need to forgive myself. That does not seem to stop the guilt, but I stumbled upon somethiong in my Borderline treatment that entreaged me. It is Mindfulness. It is simply to breathe and center what is happening in that very moment. Not yesterday, not a second past that actual breath. When I practice mindfulness I allow myself to be with myself, my "now" moments so that I cannot look at my past so much. My future is not even here so why would I look to it. When that mindful moment arrives I will handle it at that time. I am addicted. I say addicted because whatever I do sometimes I get addicted to. Whatever that can be. Usually when I am manic I am addicted to many things, but mindfulness has helped me become aware of my thoughts, my behaviors, and my moods at that exact moment.I now see my symptoms coming a little bit at a time so I now can see and recognize my mood fluctuations and attack them before they spiral out of control. Mindfulness has given me that. daily Mindfulness allows my brain and my thoughts to slow down and I can process things much better. Minfulness has given me that.